


If I Let You Down Will You Pick Me Back Up

by ChibiYoda



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: ABO dynamics, Alpha Bruce, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Omega Tony, Science Boyfriends, Science Bros, Sequel, This Is My Ship and It Has Wrecked Me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-26
Updated: 2017-03-26
Packaged: 2018-10-08 10:32:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10384713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChibiYoda/pseuds/ChibiYoda
Summary: This is a sequel to I'll Meet You at the Intersection of Hopes and Dreams. Bruce and Tony are having difficulty starting their family.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I think this can stand on its own but it might be helpful to have read Intersection. For the purposes of this story, heats occur quarterly and gestation is approximately 63 days.

Tony didn't need to say a word. Bruce knew the result just by seeing the slouch of his mate's shoulders. Sadly, Bruce wasn't surprised. He'd been leaned up against the wall outside the bathroom of the master bedroom, waiting for Tony to come out. Tony was rarely shy about anything, but this was one thing he was sensitive about. He never lets Bruce into the bathroom when he takes a pregnancy test. Bruce straightened up. "It's alright. We'll just keep trying."

"No, it's not alright!" Tony snapped, but changed his tone when Bruce quirked an eyebrow. "You never ask for anything, Bruce. This was the one thing you wanted from me and I'm denying you." Dismayed, he shuffled across the room and plopped down on the edge of the bed, trying with all his might to suppress the anger and disappointment welling up inside of him. There were many days when Tony was not fond of himself, and this issue was giving him more ammunition to hurt himself with. 

The words hit Bruce like a brick. "Not from you, with you." Bruce tried to make the distinction as Tony passed him. His heart broke seeing Tony so despondent, slumped over with his head in his hands. Look at what he'd done. He never hated himself more than he did at that moment.

Bruce had desperately hoped that it wouldn't have gone on this long. It had been acceptable, believable, that the first heat hadn't ended in a pregnancy. He was able to make lame excuses sound credible to Tony at the time. But a second failure wouldn't be as easily defensible. Ever since the day that Tony accepted his proposal, Bruce had been digging himself into a hole. He ventured in too far, and now it was time for him to be a man and crawl out.

Bruce joined Tony on the bed, leaving a bit of distance between them because, quite frankly, he wasn't sure how Tony was going to respond to what he had to say. Maybe he'd want to slug Bruce right in the face. If he did, Bruce would not only accept it, he'd welcome it.

"I'm the one to blame for this, Tony, not you, not at all." Bruce began. "I'm afraid I haven't been completely forthright with you, and I apologize."

Tony raised his head to look at his mate. "What do you mean?"

"It's entirely my fault that we're having trouble conceiving." Bruce paused for a moment to prepare himself for the worst. "You see, along with the large green side effect from the radiation, there was another." Why did he have to admit to another humiliation. Why couldn't things have worked out on their own, just this once, he thought. "While I'm not completely sterile, my sperm count is well below normal." Bruce hung his head in shame. "Well below." he repeated softly.

It was going to take a while for Tony to sort through the emotions spinning in his head from this revelation, but for now he simply wanted to know, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Heh!" Bruce's body emitted the reaction automatically. "I was already working at such a disadvantage in trying to come up with reasons why I would be an acceptable mate for you. I didn't want to give you another entry for the 'con' list. I was being selfish."

"Stupid is more like it." Tony quipped. "And let's not forget insulting, too."

Bruce turned to him.

"Did you honestly think I was gonna kick you to the curb just because your swimmers aren't playing with a full team? Thanks a lot, Bruce."

"No...not exactly...oh I don't even know anymore." Now Bruce felt even worse.

Then Tony had a flashback to the conversation they'd had the day Bruce unveiled the nursery to him. "Is that why you talked about a family 'in whatever form it might take'?"

Bruce nodded meekly. "I was trying to lay the groundwork for the possibility that instead of three or four, we might only end up with one or two. And that it would be just as fantastic."

Tony grabbed hold of Bruce's hand. "Of course it would be."

Bruce's eyes became misty. "I didn't even want to entertain the thought that there might be...none."

"Hey, no." Tony shook his head. "We're not going down that road yet. I don't know if you know me, but I don't give up that easily. I'm not gonna let you, either. We'll try again. And you know what they say, third time's a charm!"

Bruce couldn't tell if Tony was honestly optimistic, or only pretending to be, in order to spare his feelings. At this point, Bruce was grateful either way. "I don't deserve you."

Tony smiled. "The feeling is mutual."

 

The duo spent the next three months hoping for the best, while using their considerable brain power to come up with an assortment of alternatives. After all, they had science on their side. And though a few standby options were agreeable, neither wanted to admit to the other that they still clung desperately to idea of being able to leave science out of it.

 

*

*

*

 

Tony knew. He felt different. This had to be it. Of course pragmatic Bruce still made him take a test before they got their hopes up too high.

"Told you. Why do you doubt me?" Tony asked smugly.

Bruce was grinning ear to ear as he looked at the results for himself. "It'll never happen again."

Tony stared blankly and canted his head.

"Well, maybe I won't doubt you as much." Bruce amended.

Tony all but shoved Bruce onto the nearby loveseat, and crawled onto his lap. "You did it, you big Alpha stud, you."

"I suppose so." Bruce tried to appear impassive, but in reality he was feeling extremely good about himself. He added, "We did it", before locking his mouth onto Tony's.

When they reached the conclusion that a steady intake of air was needed, Bruce felt it was time to tell Tony, "You know this means you're grounded now. No suit."

Tony's eyes bugged. "So soon?! I figure I've got a couple of weeks before I'm too huge to fit into it. There's time for a quick mission. Maybe something local?"

"Absolutely not." Bruce was stone-faced and steadfast.

"Well, how about I just take one out for a spin. No fighting bad guys. Just a leisurely tour around the state, purely for sightseeing." Tony raised his right hand as a symbol of promise.

"No, Tony. That's final." Bruce glanced upward. "You got that JARVIS? Tony is not allowed to suit up."

"Quite clear, Dr. Banner." JARVIS affirmed.

"Wait...what?! You're taking his side, J?!" Tony exclaimed.

"It is a most judicious course of action, considering your current condition. I see no reason to deny Dr. Banner's request, Sir."

"Traitor." Tony grumbled.

Bruce snickered. "There, there, you'll survive."

Exasperated, Tony challenged, "So what am I allowed to do for the next two months?"

He was tempted to remove that pout from Tony's lips using his own, but Bruce refrained. He knows that it's going to be difficult for Tony to adjust to the changes ahead. He has as much sympathy for Tony's abrupt lifestyle modification as he has for himself as the one who was going to have to deal with the obstinate Omega. "You have any number of projects you can work on here. But no going out into the field, in any capacity."

"You can't keep me locked up in the tower, Bruce. I'm not Rapunzel."

Bruce's brow furrowed. "Tony, be reasonable. I did not say that you can't leave the tower. What I am saying is that I will not allow you to be put in harm's way."

Tony sighed dramatically. "Fine, fine. Whatever."

Bruce smiled at his stubborn mate. "Don't worry. You'll have lots of things to do. And when you find yourself getting bored, I'll find ways for you to occupy your time."

Tony recognized that look on Bruce's face. It was his blatantly fake innocent look. Bruce gets that look when he has something filthy on his mind.

Maybe this pregnancy thing wouldn't be too bad. 

 

Within two days, Tony had state of the art sonogram equipment installed in the med bay.

"You know I've never used one of these before, don't you." Bruce mentioned, as he inspected the device with curiosity.

"That's what the internet is for. You have some medical experience. And you're a genius. You'll figure it out."

Tony waltzed out of the facility, leaving Bruce with an unexpected project for the day. 

 

As anticipated, Bruce taught himself how to conduct a sonogram, and the next day, Tony was ready to test their new toy. He hopped up onto the table, and Bruce prepped him for the scan.

Tony studied the display screen with fascination as Bruce described what they were seeing. They gasped in unison when Bruce came upon what they'd been hoping and dreaming about. It was tiny. Barely formed. But it was there.

Buoyed by renewed optimism, Bruce continued to monitor for others. But as minutes ticked past, he was unable to locate any siblings.

Bruce tried to think of any reasonable explanation. "It's early, and you see how small it is. I'm not proficient with this equipment yet. It's possible that there's another hiding in there, and I just couldn't pick it out." He was happy. He really was. Yet he couldn't hide a trace of disappointment from his partner.

"Hey." Tony waited for Bruce to look away from the screen and over to him. "One is a great place to start." He wasn't sure if he himself bought into the platitude, but he wanted to keep Bruce's spirits up.

 

They took several more scans during the course of the week, but stopped when it became clear that their child was alone. They also wanted to be surprised as to the sex. So they focused on being exceedingly happy that they were going to be a family soon. 

 

Time passed quickly. Tony groused a bit here and there. Thankfully he didn't miss out on any exciting missions, and Bruce never had to stray far from his mate. It was kind of the miscreants of the world to take a little time off. 

At first it was business as usual. Tony would spend hours upon hours tinkering in the garage or teaming up with Bruce in their labs. But before too long he found it harder to concentrate on the things that normally occupied his time. He discovered he'd much rather curl up on the couch or in bed, with stacks of comfy pillows and Bruce's favorite quilt. Most of the time Bruce was right there with him. They'd watch movies, or read, or have the kinds of conversations that would leave others scratching their heads.

Tony was confused. He couldn't quite find the words to describe this altered state of being.

 

"Content?" Bruce asked, as he handed a bag of chips and mug of cocoa to Tony. They were about to settle in for a binge-watch-a-thon.

It then dawned on Tony. "Yes...I am." 

 

It was somewhere in the seventh week when Bruce came upon Tony studying himself in a full-length mirror.

"What are you doing?"

Tony waved a hand. "Don't look at me, Bruce. I want you to remember my body the way it was. Hot. Now I'm closer to hippo."

Bruce shook his head as he came up behind Tony and put his arms around him. Their eyes met in the mirror's reflection. "Your body looks exactly the way it's supposed to look. And I couldn't be happier about that."

Though disheartened, Tony managed a smile. He knew Bruce meant what he said, but he was still a little discouraged by his appearance. "You always know what to say, don't you."

Bruce snorted. "Hardly. I just get lucky sometimes."

He started to lean his head back to rest it against Bruce's shoulder, when Tony felt a sharp pain. He jolted forward, sucking in a breath.

"What is it?" Bruce gently rubbed Tony's back.

Through gritted teeth Tony replied, "I don't know, but it wasn't pleasant."

Something caught Bruce's eye. He glanced down and saw a red stain on Tony's pants. He spoke calmly. "Tony, I think we should go to the hospital."

"But it's not time!" Tony was trying to convince himself, as well as Bruce of that. "Besides, we were supposed to do this here. At home. Not some stuffy hospital. I bought us that fancy sonogram machine. Can't you just take a look?" Another pain hit him hard. He tried not to let on, but the grimace on his face betrayed him.

"Tony, listen. Taking a look isn't going to help us if something is wrong. We'll just be wasting precious time. If this baby is coming now, I can't do it alone. We'll need qualified help and equipment that we don't have. We won't stay if we don't absolutely have to. I promise. But we have to go."

Accepting Bruce's decision, they swiftly but carefully departed.

 

From the moment they arrived at the hospital it was a flurry of activity. Neither of them had time to think straight. Their baby was coming today. More than 2 weeks before the due date. Bruce had been right to insist that he bring Tony in. The child was in immediate need of the care of professionals and specialized equipment. They were only offered a brief moment to meet their newest collaboration before it was carried off.

 

"A boy." Tony was exhausted, but the twinkle in his eyes conveyed the joy in his heart.

"A son." Bruce punctuated through a pained smile. 

 

A few hours later Bruce wheeled Tony down to the NICU to visit their child. Bruce had already spent as much time there as he was allowed, but this was Tony's first venture to the unit. He'd undergone several scans and tests to see if a cause for the premature birth could be determined. And though he had been encouraged to rest for a while, Tony had mercilessly pestered the doctors, nurses and anyone else within earshot. When he got particularly frustrated, he downright threatened physical and legal action, until the staff finally gave up, and let him leave his room.

Being in the chair put the incubator more or less at face level to Tony. Getting as close as he could, his nose practically touched the enclosure. In a broken voice he lamented, "He's so small, Bruce. I don't think I've ever seen something this small. Why did this have to happen?"

Knelt beside Tony, Bruce was about to scrape up some form of comforting words, when the doctor in charge of Tony's case came up behind them.

"He may be small, but he's strong. A fighter. A survivor, if I've ever seen one," the man offered.

"He takes after you then, Bruce. I'm glad for that."

Bruce huffed and shook his head, too emotional to argue the point with his mate.

The doctor continued. "I have an answer as to why the premature birth occurred, but I'm afraid it only poses another question. And it's a puzzle which I haven't been able to solve."

The pair turned their attention to him.

"Tony's uterine wall is unstable. It wasn't able to support the child to full term. That's what caused the early birth. What I haven't been able to determine is what caused the damage to the uterus." It was evident that the man was genuinely perplexed.

The first thing that came to Tony's mind was his alter-ego. "My body has taken a beating in my armors. Could that be it?"

The physician shook his head. "No, I'm fairly certain that physical trauma could not have caused the kind of degradation I see. It's almost as if the lining was attacked from the inside. Yet, all of your test results are within normal ranges."

 

_The device that's keeping you alive is also killing you._

 

"Poisoning." Tony looked to Bruce. "The palladium."

"I'm afraid I'm not following you," the doctor interjected.

"A few years ago I suffered a little bout of palladium poisoning. Things got a bit dicey there for a while."

Bruce winced at the memory of Tony telling him the story.

The physician's initial shock at the claim progressed to an agreement on the theory. "Having no other explanation, damage due to poisoning seems the most plausible cause at this point." 

 

Back in Tony's room, Bruce climbed into bed with him. It had been a long day, and both of them needed whatever rest they could manage to obtain.

With not much room to spare, Tony cuddled up to Bruce's side. "Kids were nowhere on my radar back then. Something like this never crossed my mind. I should have known. I should have gotten checked out. Just because I felt better didn't mean that everything was ok. I can't believe I let this happen. I almost killed him, Bruce."

"Shhh. That's enough." Bruce squeezed Tony tighter. "This isn't your fault. You did nothing wrong. He's going to be fine. You'll see. He just needs a little time." 

 

*

*

*

 

"I think he likes you better. He keeps kicking the Iron Man blanket off."

"I hardly think that's the case, Tony."

There at the tower, in the nursery that Bruce had created, he and Tony stood at the crib, admiring the infant that they'd created together. The child had made incredible strides in his recovery, rebounding more quickly than anticipated.

"I'm sorry I can't carry any more children for you, Bruce."

"I'm sorry for giving you only one." Bruce laid his hand over the one Tony had rested on the crib.

After a moment, Bruce took a deep breath and proclaimed, "Now, no more of this. No more wallowing. No more blaming ourselves for 'what ifs' and 'what may have beens'. It's time to take credit for the bundle of wonderful we do have." He looked down at his son, beaming.

"He is pretty awesome, isn't he."

They were very proud of their little guy.

"I think it's time we settled on a name for him." Bruce suggested.

"But Baby Boy Banner was starting to grow on me." Tony teased.

"I think we can come up with something a little more suitable. We're geniuses, right? We'll figure it out. I hear that's what the internet is for." Bruce winked at Tony.

Both men chuckled at the joke, while their thoroughly unimpressed son made his opinion known with a healthy yawn.


End file.
